Book Review: Breaking the Gender Code

If you think the DaVinci Code was a great book and movie you might just be ready for Breaking the Gender Code. How women can use what they already have to get what they actually want.

Danielle’s book is a deep dive into the genesis of ‘the gender code’. It’s that hardwired code that is so ingrained in society it’s hard to step back and understand it, And it is ‘the thing that those of us who really believed we could have it all, or still think we can/have, are actually living out.

Breaking the Gender Code takes you back through the genesis of ‘the code’. Then explores why the super mum, super businesswoman, super everything is an un achievable pathway. In fact, the performance pressures being a super woman puts on us and our families is detrimental to ourselves and our family. And only you can change this.

Rather than taking the reader on an existential journey through gender politics, Breaking the Gender Code is about empowering each one of us to see the over-achieving pressures for what they are and, more importantly how to write and execute your own code.

There are four parts to this book

  1. Where are we now
  2. How did we get here?
  3. What are the Gender Code performance pressures?
  4. How to write and execute your own code – where Danielle shares her six-step process, CIRCLE.

I love the first paragraph of Danielle’s book.

Do you feel like you are never doing enough? Would you like to understand more clearly what ‘doing and being enough’ means? What difference would that make to your daily life? Would it give you more space and energy to do what matters to you without feeling guilty?

This pretty much encapsulates the insights provided in Danielle’s book.

There is an action plan – CIRCLE

A key aspect of this book is that Danielle shares a clear action plan for how the reader can take the first and then next steps to working through how to write your own code, and it’s not a ‘burn the bridges’ approach. It’s about looking inside first, deeply understanding why and how you are the way you are and behave, what parts you’re happy with and what parts/behaviours you want to change or effect change in your life.

When I was working with Danielle on the book I remember sharing with her that I felt I was fortunate that I grew up with three older brothers. That I was treated no differently by them or my parents because I was a girl. Naturally, I was a thorough tomboy till I hit the age of 13. Having read through Danielle’s book I realised that I had specific gender-coding, and that it explains much about who I am, my core traits and behaviours.

I thoroughly recommend this book for women and men who have been sucked in to the superwoman, over-achiever gender code. This book will provide you with great insight and actionable tools to rewrite and execute your own code.

You can purchase a copy in our shop.

If you’d like to learn more or work with Danielle, here’s her website,